9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
