i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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