even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize