Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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