OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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