Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
