Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
you will always have a special place in my vag
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
