What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
