from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize