it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
Randomize
