I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
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