did you get engaged???
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
