Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
