Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
