you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
