I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
