just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
