he puts the penis in happiness.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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