U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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