Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
