so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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