nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
