question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
