walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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