Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
