I swear she didn't look like that last week.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
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