butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
