I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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