I'm lost and stupid without you.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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