awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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