Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Randomize
