How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
