Me too!
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
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