perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
