Nicole vs. Life
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Come see our sink grown plant.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
