Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
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