So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he was CRYING into my vagina
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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