she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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