i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
