So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
