im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
