Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
