sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I think my vagina is haunted
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
