If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize