forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Randomize
