i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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