physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
