I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Randomize
