I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
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