Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
